Saturday, January 15, 2011

Two Steps Forward... One Step Back

It was a pretty full week. And it was fuller because it was characterized by some 'milestone' activities. And while said activities were trivial in the greater scope of life, they seemed to hold more significance than many of my recent endeavors. (Granted, placing 1st and 2nd in your two fantasy football leagues is no small accomplishment). They carry with them a quality of 'growing up' as well as a reminder that I'll never fully grow up or grow away from the emotions of earlier days/years.

First of all... I got a library card. Library cards seem to have an automatic K-12 connotation, but for me it seemed to be evidence of progress and even maturity. I'm trying to watch less television and I miss reading fiction. So I found the closest branch of the city library and became a card-carrying member.

And, with some eclectic flair, I took home a newly-printed dual-novel of A Tale of Two Cities/Great Expectations by Charles Dickens along with two Louis L'Amour westerns. I've read Great Expectations, but knew nothing about 'A Tale' except... ' it was the best of times; it was the worst of times.'

I am slowly wading through the other-worldly writing style to add some culture to my existence. If that's not mature, than I'm not sure what is, right?

Secondly, I got a new phone. I'm a late-comer to the Android world, and am playing some quick catch-up to maximize the opportunities and utilities of the app-filled world, not to mention the increased convenience of having a high-functioning mini-computer in the palm of your hand.
So far, so good.


And finally, I re-entered the world of some pre-adolescent insecurity* by way of a basketball league 'tryout.' I use that term a bit loosely, but it was interesting to revisit some of the 'will i be picked last' emotions that most kids feel in a playground kickball game. It's not nearly as devastating to think about not being picked to play with guys I barely know, but there's a big part of my male ego that feels the need to prove myself. Even recognizing evidence of pre-teen insecurity in my adult life is significant, I think.

(*Actually, I think insecurity is insecurity whether you are 11 or 50. I just think that the 50 yr old has a more refined ability to deal with [or cover-up] the outside pressures and emotions that lead to insecurity...most of the time )

Anyway... 2010 was a year of a long learning curve. (read: hard year)  I wonder what 2011 has in store. It seems to be starting off 'full' as well as educational.


More than just okay January 16, 2011 at 2:55 PM  

Had to read Tale in high school. Waded through pages and pages, but then the last 30 were worth it all. I've always liken my college years to that opening best/worst of times. It was in so many ways.

2010 was a hard year for me as well. But things are looking up.

And while I'm not quite 50 yet, I definitely don't have handling insecurity down at all. I'm such a basket case. :-D

Have a good year!

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